Hais, day by day the time pass. As i see the time pass, me heart will ache. Thinking about lots of things. Really missed those day when i'm not having probation or any shit. Its like a free life. Afternoon go slack, night we go fishing, bbq, ghost house until the sun rises. I really miss those kind of life. When can i get it back ? Its like i have no worries, no thoughts, just do what i feel i like to do. But now ? Everything is taken away from me. I'm just left with all this kind of shit to clear up. I want to end this quickly. I want my life back. I almost give up everything that i can to do what is right. Wrong things are already washed away from my filthy mind. All i can do now is pray. (ryan,sengkiong,kenny,peter,jinnie,xjon) Although this is hurtful but i think we all have what we want to do in mind already. Hope you all have a great life and use good use of it. Don't go back to what you once was.
(Baby), I'm sorry. I don't know why i just feel this way but i need some time to really think about it. I don't know what i'm thinking. Maybe its just unfair for you to be alone out there and suffering for what stupid things i did. Even your family also look down on me. I really don't know what to do already. I'm very tired of living. But i won't stupid until go end my life. This is what brian is. As you know, I'm a guy that always stands up on my rights. I say what i want and i get what i want. People don't step on my tail and i won't go step their tail. That the moral of my life. Hope you get it. The next time i really don't know where to land my feet. Its just a complicated thing right now. I hope you can understand. Sorry my dear.

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I really need to reflect. What do i want to be when another 10years appear infront of me. What should i do ? I really need someone to talk to. Someone that understands what i'm facing. Someone that really will be there no matter what happen to me. When will the someone appear. I want to express out all my anger inside my heart right now. Just one min i'm also fine with it. I guess it's goodbye then . Till next time..